Step 12 of the AA program is:  “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

We come to the end of our initial meditation of how all of us can use profitably use the 12 steps of the 12 step program begun by Dr. Bob S and Bill W. in 1934 in Akron, Ohio for those struggling with alcohol addiction. Since that time the program has been adapted for use by those struggling with addictions to other drugs, food, gambling, and sex.  It is also used by loved ones of those struggling with addictions.

As I have earlier stated. my understanding of addiction is it is the attachment to some thing, person, behavior or substance to avoid dealing with ourselves.  Although we may experiment with various ways of relaxing or feeling better,  with addiction the thing, person, substance or behavior becomes our primary focus to the extent that the other parts of our life are adversely affected. With some addictions brain actually changes and, thus, the addiction has be treated as any other disease.  

The addictive journey frequently, or perhaps always,  begins as a way for we humans to avoid dealing the seemingly core belief we adopt very early in life that we are missing something; that we are not enough; that we need to somehow prove our worth.  Often we either embark on a journey to get enough money, education, religion, or possessions  to prove we are better than or we can look for some behavior or substance which essentially numbs us to the point that we are unable to function in a healthy way.  Neither way works long term.  It is never enough.

Regardless of what we have used in an attempt to avoid being with ourselves as we are, if we are lucky we all come to a point where we are forced to face ourselves.  If we are very lucky we have identified a program or system for beginning our spiritual journey of healing/recovery.  The two men who began the 12 step program, along with other alcoholics, stumbled on or were inspired to create a 12 step program which required a step by step course of work which led to a “spiritual awakening” and, thus, a way for them to find serenity and then to go on to help other struggling alcoholics. 

Unlike some of the religious systems with which many of us were raised, the 12-step program offers a system of spiritual growth/recovery/awakening which, without any use of the concept of shame, if followed, leads to what is called a spiritual awakening.    I am very comfortable using the term spiritual awakening.  Others may want to use a different terms.  Oxfordictionary.com defines spiritual as:  “Of, relating to, or affecting the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things.”    Many of we humans,

even if we cannot define spirit or spiritual can identify with the “dis ease” of the spirit – a general sense of not being at home or at peace in our own body.  Some individuals who think in terms of systems might describe this  as an imbalance in this wonderful system we call the human body which is part of ever increasing circle of systems which encompasses the entire universe or  universes. 

I have been suggesting that the 12 step program as devised by those two struggling men in Akron, Ohio in 1934 can be used by all of us to  step by step become more at peace with ourselves and the systems of which we are a part.

We can, of course, use other systems but I want to suggest that whatever system we use include all the steps/pieces which are included in the 12 steps.  We can certainly use some religious or philosophical  approaches such as the Buddhism, or other mind body approaches. I do not think it matters.

Spiritual growth/recovery is contagious.  One of the traditions of the 12 step program is “attraction not promotion”.  Those who are feeling good about themselves and about claiming a good life of which they can be proud will find that other people notice that they have something they want. This provides them an opportunity to share the program which has guided them to this enviable place in their life journey.

Long before I knew of the 12 step program I had the habit of searching out people who had some of “that something” which I wanted.  I would hear or meet or see someone who had a passion for life and for creating a more just and loving world and “just know” that they had something I wanted. I have been known to go up to a stranger and say to them, “I am Jim Pickett. You have something I want. Can we talk?”   Without fail, people were willing to share.  Since becoming familiar with the 12 step program, working as an addiction counselor and attending meetings with clients many of those people who have something I wanted have or now use the 12 step program.  The willingness of people to share what they have found in the 12 step program is, like Grace, a gift one cannot earn – one for which one can only be grateful.

Of course, being the greedy person that I am I continue to seek out other teachers  such as a Buddhist Nun, the recently deceased author and teacher, Wayne Dyer, the yoga teacher Matthew Sanford, and  many more who I have mentioned in other blogs.

On page 106 on AA.org we read:

“THE joy of living is the theme of A.A.’s Twelfth Step, and action is its key word. Here we turn outward toward our fellow alcoholics who are still in distress. Here we experience the kind of giving that asks no rewards. Here we begin to practice all Twelve Steps of the program in our daily lives so that we and those about us may find emotional sobriety. When the Twelfth Step is seen in its full implication, it is really talking about the kind of love that has no price tag on it.

Our Twelfth Step also says that as a result of practicing all the Steps, we have each found something called a spiritual awakening. “  P 106  aa.org

Let us again remind ourselves what the aa 12th step says:

“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

Actually it is because the recovering alcoholic is practicing those principles in all his/her affairs that they have that “something” which others are going to find so attractive.  Because of their resulting spiritual awakening they are going to want to share their story with others.  As they share with others they are going to be listening to themselves and, thus, reminding themselves that they must continue to use the tools of the program – the 12 steps, sponsor, meetings, conventions, spiritual retreats – if they are to hold on to their spiritual awakening which… It is always a circle.

I, of, course, am suggesting that we can all have that spiritual awakening. As I have previously suggested  it is important to not allow  one’s history with a word to keep one from getting what one needs and deserves.  If the word spiritual has too much  baggage than call  it just “an awakening”, “a blossoming” or “claiming joy” or whatever.

It is not surprising to me that the 12 step program makes liberal use of the shortened version of Reinhold Niebuhr’s prayer

The Serenity Prayer

The full text of the original "Serenity Prayer" written by Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971)

GOD, grant me the serenity

to accept the things

I cannot change,

Courage to change the

things I can, and the

wisdom to know the difference.

Many do not know the full version of this prayer. It is:

The Serenity Prayer

The full text of the original "Serenity Prayer" written by Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971)

GOD, grant me the serenity

to accept the things

I cannot change,

Courage to change the

things I can, and the

wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;

Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardship as the

pathway to peace.

Taking, as He did, this

sinful world as it is,

not as I would have it.

Trusting that He will make

all things right if I

surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy

in this life, and supremely

happy with Him forever in

the next.

Amen

This is the full prayer attributed to Karl Paul Reinhold Niebuhr reportedly written in 1926. Niebuhr was a Lutheran pastor and theologian.

Hopefully, the 13 blogs I have written on the 12 steps have been helpful to some.  Certainly writing them have been  a helpful reminder to me.  I appreciate being able to share my thoughts and feelings with you, the reader, and am very grateful for your ongoing encouragement and loving support.

Written September 17, 2015

                 

As is true for most of we humans, it is not unusual for me to be say something critical about the decision of the President of the United States, one of the cabinet members, a Senator or Representative, the leader of another country, the action of the military of this or another county, representatives of radical groups who initiate violent behavior or who react to the behavior of others in a violent manner.

Just this morning I was shaking my head as I read the newspaper accounts of the beginning of the trial of a young man in Colorado who set off a bomb in a movie theater complex some years ago, of more bombings in Iraq,  of more killing in Yemen, of riots in Baltimore, of the investigations of the actions of some police persons who are accused of using “unnecessary force”.

When I am sitting in my comfortable home or having coffee with a friend it is very easy for me to express self-righteous criticism of a person(s) who thinks that violence is an appropriate response to violence or the threat of violence.   It is easy for me to posit the opinion that so and so is really dumb for not understanding that reacting with violence has never worked long term for an individual or a nation.

Sometimes I am reading about or thinking about domestic violence which, as reported, is frequently a male being violent towards a woman although I have often known of cases of the violence being initiated by a female against a male or another female or initiated by a male against another male. 

It is easy to assume or come to the conclusion that it is as natural for the human being to respond to a threat or perceived threat as it is for many other animals.  If we are a student of the behavior of a variety of animals we well aware that we humans are not the only ones to react to violence or  initiate violence to protect one’s territory, family, or community. We humans probably have the distinction of being the only ones who argue over a belief system.   It is difficult to imagine a lion, a wolf or some other animals arguing about what God or the Gods expect of them or what the God(s) will reward them for.    I can imagine aa lion fighting to protect its food source, but it is difficult for me to imagine a lion in lion speak claiming that God(s) are demanding that they kill the rabbit because the rabbit has been sexually promiscuous or because the squirrel look shared a meal with a chipmunk. One gets the idea.

One wonders what would happen if we quit positing a concept of God(s) whom is concerned about what is “natural” or “unnatural”.  It seems to that that we humans from the beginning of recorded history have been thinking of new ways to behave or interact with the world and each other.   Whether we use the discovery of how to make a fire, create houses which can be cooled or heated, medicines which change the “natural” progression of an illness, a prosthesis which allow Boston Marathon runner who lost his or her legs to again run on two legs we humans have been destroying the “natural” order for a very long time with very positive results. On the other hand, we could easily confuse “natural order” with “balance”.  It certainly is true that there are many examples, which show how we humans have failed to fully explore  how changing one thing affects the overall balance of nature. If, for example, we introduce certain foods to systems, which are not used to those foods or not designed for those foods, there are going to be negative results because we have failed to take into account how a human organism would react to that substance.  An analogy might be what happens if I put diesel fuel into my current car.  I know that my car will not be happy. I also know that I can have changes made to my car so that it will run on diesel fuel and thus maintain a “natural” balance for that car.

Let us then suppose for the sake of this discussion that we can agree to not use the concept of “natural” or “unnatural” to justify our behavior. Let us also agree that we are going to quit tying to think for God(s) or use the “teachings” of others about what God(s) wants or do not want as a basis for our thoughts or behavior. What are we left with?   We are left with the ideas of those who have proposed that we creatively find ways to share the resources of the world, create more resources by changing how we grow crops, reduce the number of new births and, perhaps most importantly, find new ways of affirming the worth of each of us.  If I do not have to worry about earning the favor of God(s) or whether I am to have a seat in “heaven”, then perhaps I can begin to entertain the possibility that all of us have worth; that all of us deserve to be treated with love and respect.

You might then say, “

That would be all fine as long as we got everyone to agree to those two conditions, but that is not going to happen. What good wills it does if a few of us are the only ones to adopt these conditions?  Let me tell you No good at all.  Others will continue to mistreat, torture or kill me in the name of God, Allah, Elohim, Buddha or in the name any of the other 111 names for God I found listed. “  Yes, that is true, I might respond.  On the other hand what if, for today, I decide to treat those which whom I have direct or indirect contact with dignity and respect?  What if I refuse to attest that my way is better or right? What if I see my brother who might happen to be a minister of a very conservative church or the leader of the local mosque or an atheist or a person who is advocating the use of violence to respond to the terrible situations around the world as just another human being who is no better or worse than I; who just wants to be treated with dignity and respects?   What if I focus on having empathy for the leader of a country, including the President of the United States?  Truth be told I have no idea of how I might act if I was placed for even on day in that position.   What if I focus on loving that person who violently disagrees with me?

What if I decide to focus on noticing my self righteous, often arrogant, perceived “need” to prove my way of thinking is the right way, the best way or the only way? It does not matter if that is how the other person is thinking or behaving.   What if I can even entertain the idea of seeing myself in the other person and having true compassion for that person?  That would requiring me taking the leap of trusting that I am worthwhile without have to be brilliant, right, more moral, or the only one with a direct line to the deity of my choice?

In essence what I am proposing is that I focus on what I can control and ignore what I cannot control. What I can control is to practice showing up with love, accepting that I do not have “the” answers and  not accepting the invitation to engage in debate about whose God is right or whose deity is right.

If I do that I will be standing in the shoes of Richard Wright’s, Rosa Parks, Father Gregory Boyle,  Bigger Thomas, Martin Luther King, Mother Theresa, Pope Francis and other courageous people.